VIDEO: Blondie singing One Way or Another
Blodie’s always been my very favorite femme girl crush–tough, could totally help me out in a bar fight, wouldn’t put up with any of my shit, but at the same time, all soft and shiny with suckable lips and whispy wavey things that make her look floaty and glimmery. Que HAWT. (I was four years old when I was crushing on her, which makes me incapable as a grown woman to describe sexual attraction in terms that are not related to fairy princesses. ha!)
So, to delurk tonight–please, let us all in on your school child crushes. Who defined your youthful romantic life? (and ms. hoffa, NO YOU CAN NOT mention even one LETTER of blond boy faker wanna be here!)
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December 20th, 2008 at 4:47 pm #
I think she is why I still love lip gloss.
December 20th, 2008 at 4:48 pm #
In elementary school my walls were covered with Duran Duran, Michael J. Fox & River Phoenix. Perhaps one of INXS too. swoooon!
Youthful romance? You need to buy me drinks for that one chica!
December 20th, 2008 at 5:12 pm #
Oh no way. I grew up in the 70s; do you know how many opportunities for embarrassing, not to say deeply mortifying, crushes there were back then? People were wearing plaid on purpose!
Sigh. All right. First, the indefensible:
William Shatner
David Cassidy (oh WHY)
Burt Ward (really, WHY)
The marginally more defensible:
Dustin Hoffman
Emilio Delgado (“Luis” on Sesame Street–poor mom thought I just wanted to see Snuffleupagus, HA)
Andy Gibb
I think I miss long hair on men more than I realize. That needs to come back. That and short shorts.
Anyway, none of these are as wonderful as Debbie Harry. BUT AT LEAST THEY AREN’T JT.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:13 pm #
School child crushes? I am old. You won’t get the reference, but, as a boy, I lusted after the June Taylor Dancers. They were the showgirls who came out at the beginning of the Jackie Gleason show. Every Friday night I would rush to the TV to look at them, their fabulous legs, their identical smiles.
Many years later, I was at an AA meeting. The speaker was a charming, witty elderly woman who went on tell a horrible story about drunkenness, addiction, confinement to various jails and state hospitals and a her years as one of the June Taylor Dancers. Damn.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:17 pm #
@ilyka
you got that right, missy. I think that william shatner may come *close* to JT, but even he has some good spots (like the ability to grow hair on his chest.) ha!
I personally thought barry gibb rocked the world–and you know what? I love hairy men, I love hairy chests, I thought burt reynolds HERE was the sexiest hawtest rockingest best man of all men in the world. I still would if I didn’t know he was a massive dick head, in general.
I hate hate hate clean shaven chests, and think clean shaven *anything* is the generational tragedy of the new millineum. You make make fun of me now, but you shall never shame me. ever.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:22 pm #
you got that right, missy. I think that william shatner may come *close* to JT, but even he has some good spots (like the ability to grow hair on his chest.) ha!
I personally thought barry gibb rocked the world–and you know what? I love hairy men, I love hairy chests, I thought burt reynolds HERE was the sexiest hawtest rockingest best man of all men in the world. I still would if I didn’t know he was a massive dick head, in general.
I hate hate hate clean shaven chests, and think clean shaven *anything* is the generational tragedy of the new millineum. You make make fun of me now, but you shall never shame me. ever.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:23 pm #
@jon
just found this online: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xkvhv_soundie-jiveroo_music
I see your point. call me old fashioned, but I think that they are WAY hotter than today’s dancers. I love that shit.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:24 pm #
I *tried* to like duran duran. Just couldn’t. I did really like river phoenix–but I like Joaquin Phoenix SO much better. there weren’t many in the 80′s who could hold my attention. for real. 80′s were the death of my soul.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:29 pm #
I don’t know if I really had childhood crushes– I don’t know that I’ve ever really been the type to crush (my fiancée thinks I’m endlessly weird for this). Sadly, this makes me a boring delurker, but I’m delurking anyway!
December 20th, 2008 at 5:32 pm #
Oh no…
Elementary school was David Bowie, Ric Ocasic (I probably just spelled that wrong), Eric Estrada, Mick Jagger, Steven Tyler, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, George Harrison, Madonna, Cyndi Lauper, and all the DeBarge’s.
Middle school got rather crazier.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:33 pm #
ooh, aaminah, I was ALL about eric estrada in the olden days. he’s STILL one fine Latin@ hombre, ya feeling me? mmmmhm.
December 20th, 2008 at 5:37 pm #
you know amapola, I had moments of extreme confusion–where there there weren’t any women/girls I was crushing on, but there were HUGE boy band crushes running rampant in my school–like new kids on the block were HUUUUUUGE in my school, and not only was I not interested, I actively did not get it. Why on *earth* were all these girls screaming like that? they were just *boys* for christ sake. ha.
seriously tho, your post reminded me that in many ways, I think that there is/was way too much pressure on kids to crush on people to prove their ‘normalcy’. which I think just does little more than scare the shit out of those of us who know we’re crushing on the “wrong” people and confuse the shit out of kids who simply are more interested in playing ball.
December 20th, 2008 at 6:02 pm #
Oh yeah, BFP, I DEF feel ya on that.
He IS fine. Of course, I personally think that Latino men (well, really, all men of color, and women of color too) get hotter with age. 
December 20th, 2008 at 6:03 pm #
Ha ha, should have said, you know, I’m thw chick who still thinks Fidel is hot, and whatever disgust I hold for bin Laden, I do think he LOOKS great, LOL.
December 20th, 2008 at 6:05 pm #
ha! yeah, and i think I’ve somewhat shamefacedly admitted on my other blog that I think alberto gonzales is hawtie mchawtster.
screw that he’s responsible for destroying the lives of at the very least 500 people in guantanamo. mr. thang can rock out the mexican hair like THAT.
December 20th, 2008 at 6:21 pm #
Okay, that picture of Burt? I was just talking about that with someone on Twitter, after we had both just seen this.
But yes to chest hair. And when it comes up high enough to be peeking out above the shirt collar I am DONE.
Also yes to Erik Estrada–how could I have forgotten?
December 20th, 2008 at 6:23 pm #
ilyka–I toldja and toldja, you shall never ever shame me. bring the kangaroos on, baby. do your best. I shall always be proud of my attractions.
December 20th, 2008 at 9:20 pm #
Why, oh *why* did you ask this question? Now everyone will know how strange I am
.
–Mantenna from “She-Ra.” My mom admitted later that she wondered what kind of boys I’d bring home.
–Starscream from “Transformers. Yes, I crushed on a talking jet.
–Rick Moranis
–Joey McEntyre from “New Kids on the Block,” which is as bad as JT.
–Gordon, Luis, Maria and Linda from “Sesame Street”
–Martin Short
–LeVar Burton, via “Reading Rainbow.”
–Michael J. Fox
–Malcolm-Jamal Warner
–M.C. Hammer
–Corey Feldman
–Elijah Wood (Everyone else liked Macauley Culkin. Fools!)
–Malcolm Jamal Wariner
–Will Smith
–Jaleel White
–Sissy Spacek, via “Carrie”
–Jeff Goldblum, via “Jurassic Park”
December 20th, 2008 at 10:14 pm #
My childhood crushes were embarrassing in a totally different way – they were pretty much all fictional, either in print or, yes, animated (I watched a lot of anime as a kid, okay?). I would like to say that the part where they were all fucked up and depressed only reflected my fondness as a child (and uh secretly now) for big dramatic series where good and evil were not alway 100% clear, and did not in any way foreshadow my future relationship choices, but, well, if wishes were horses, etc. etc.
December 20th, 2008 at 10:26 pm #
I didn’t crush on famous people until much later, ie college, I never saw the point since I knew nothing could happen… But I will admit to thinking jon from nkotb was cute…
December 21st, 2008 at 11:40 am #
Yeah I’m also one of the weird types who more or less turned away from celebrity crush behavior as a child, viewing it with suspicion as a trap of some sort. I guess I’ve always been very pragmatic or something, I’m not sure. And there were always flesh-and-blood human beings in my life who seemed to me more beautiful than glossy onscreen glamour. Or maybe it’s just that the mainstream rejected me so I rejected it. The idea of an Asian guy being with, say, Farah Fawcett…was not an idea. So really, I had nowhere to go with such thoughts. So I didn’t. Yup, a pragmatic little thinker.
Okay, in order to not cop out, I will name the Madeleine L’Engle character Meg from the Wrinkle in Time series. It’s possible that I had a bit of a thing for her.
December 21st, 2008 at 8:25 pm #
Christopher Lloyd and Malcolm McDowell. I AM NOT ASHAMED.
I convinced myself that I was in love with NKOTB because all the other girls were, but secretly I had a thing for old white dudes.
December 22nd, 2008 at 1:57 am #
Major crush on Annabella Lwin of Bowwowwow! [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annabella_Lwin]
She was only fourteen at the time of her sudden fame and the frenzied attention of middle aged white men was totally creepy. But I was fifteen (born on the same day a year earlier) and I was in love ! I dreamed of meeting her all the time! When I got older and met so many much more famous people who I admired, I still held out hope of meeting her! To be honest, I still do. I think we could have been friends. Ahhh! To be fifteen and in love. I miss that.
December 22nd, 2008 at 3:49 am #
Betty Boop.
I was a deprived child.
December 22nd, 2008 at 7:06 am #
Oh, my Jeremy–you certainly were. ha!
can I add too, that I feel very privileged to be around people who admit to having crushed on story book characters???? Atticus Finch was my *ideal* from about 8 years old till about 15 or so. And I still carry a very soft spot for him–he, I think, was my original and only male crush for years and years….
oh, and the little boy who goes evil in the lion the witch and the wardrobe? what was his name? Edmund, I think? He was my official “I can change him” boy crush–I have always had much much MUCH too soft of a spot for the people who are conflicted anti-heros. I prolly would be crushing on draco malfoy or something.
December 22nd, 2008 at 7:11 am #
can I say too, speaking of draco malfoy–I really really appreciate that JKR made it so that malfoy grew up into a balding sorta not ‘hawt’ character at all. She’s talked about recognizing women/girls tendancy to fall for the conflicted anti-hero because it was something *she* did, and how she got into an abusive relationship because of it. I greatly appreciate that she recognizes that people ‘crush’ on story book characters and that they mold their lives on those romantic crushes–and made a point of showing that those ‘romantic anti-heros’ are not all that attractive most times, because they wind up in a corner whimpering and are finally old, balding and distant.
My kids have learned so much about dating and love from the harry potter novels. They will prolly be writing into some blog in 30 years about how deprived *they* were!!! haha!
December 23rd, 2008 at 6:18 am #
Wow… I think I’m crushin’ on Kai now ::blushes::
See, I read stuff like the complete works of Shakespeare (7th grade; had already read a few of his plays earlier, and have always preferred Mercutio over Romeo), the Autobiography of Malcolm X and Richard Wright (both in 5th grade) when I was young… I read all my dad’s philosophy books though, so when I did read fiction it was brain-dead Sweet Valley High, in which there is no one appealing to a girl who has already read not only the Chronicles of Narnia but also all of C.S. Lewis’ non-fiction work. When you said “school child” I was thinking pre-middle school years… ha ha, I don’t think of myself as being a child by the time I got into middle school.
December 23rd, 2008 at 9:45 pm #
this thread made my day
December 24th, 2008 at 1:32 pm #
I so agree!
I so love hair on men’s chests. If you can’t grow it, that’s fine but if you do, don’t shave! Embrace who you are. What’s wrong with body hair anyway? I wish people would just put-those-razors-down for a minute (and Nair should be abolished).
Yep, Barry Gibb, best looking Bee-Gee. Saturday Night Fever made a big impression.
I still have my Burt Cosmo centerfold! It’s not in the shower anymore but it still is all there.
Oooh Malcolm beginning in “Time after Time” and even “Heroes”.
The only embarrassing crush (now) was that when I was nine, I wanted to marry Charlton Heston based on his 1960s and early 70s movies.
I loved Georg Standford Brown too, since he came to my junior high school with other members of the “Roots” cast to talk about it. I wound up temping for his financial adviser years later and met him and his then wife. He was really nice.